Dreaming of Jessica

I rarely remember dreaming during the night. It is an exciting event when I wake up and realize that I actually had a dream the night before, even though I cant recall what it was about. So, when I awake remembering that I had a dream and specifics about what happened in the dream, Hell is on the verge of freezing over!

A few days ago, I woke up from one of those dreams that seems real. It was probably the weirdest/funniest dream I have ever had in my life. Since I am writing this a few days later, I may have forgotten or mixed up some of the details, but the story is still very entertaining.

It was my wedding day. For some reason, everyone was on a bus waiting to go to the temple for the sealing. We were just waiting on Shay. I was sitting in the front of the bus, saving a seat for Shay when another girl got on and sat down next to me. I looked over to her and said, “Sorry, but I am saving this seat for my fiancée, she should be here any second.” When I looked over at her, I recognized her immediately…it was Jessica Alba. She responded, “I was walking by this bus, when I felt that if I got on, I would find the man of my dreams. That man is you.

(No, this is not a made up story to provide a valid excuse to put a picture of Jessica Alba on my blog!)

I was completely shocked by that and had nothing to say. Next thing I know, she tells the bus driver everyone is on and we head off to the wedding. She sits back down and says, “We are getting married right now,” and nothing else.

What happened between now and the next part I don’t remember, but we were married in some form or another.

Next, I remember being done with all the events for the day. Instead of going to our hotel then heading out on our honeymoon, we stayed our first night at my parents house. It wasn’t the house we live in now, but it was still a very nice house. We were going to stay in a room in the attic. It was decorated very nicely, but you could tell no one had been in there in a while. There was a lot of clutter, but not dirty. We brought all of our stuff up to the room, then headed back downstairs to figure out what to do about our honeymoon.

Since the plane ticket was in Shaylee’s name, we could not leave the next morning. We talked it over with my parents and decided to push back our reservations to Saturday, giving us plenty of time to get everything ready. The weird thing is my parents decided not to move back the open house. They said we didn’t need to be there and they would take care of it.

We headed back upstairs to turn in for the night. Even though it was our wedding night, we stayed up late just talking and ended up sleeping in separate beds. Even though I recognized her as Jessica Alba, in the dream I don’t think she was famous or rich. Since we had only met earlier that day, I didn’t know anything about her. What her finances were like, what her personality was like, etc. When I asked her how much money she had saved her response was, “My parents gave me a US Savings Bond when I was a girl.” That was it!

There was a second day to the dream but I don’t remember anything about it. The worst part about the dream was my conflicting feelings about the whole situation with Shay. On one hand, everything felt right with Jessica Alba, but on the other hand, Shay never found out what happened! She would have come out to the bus and it was gone. I wanted to call her and explain, but I figured her parents would be really mad at me and not let her talk. It was a horrible feeling! Also, I don’t know where Jessica Alba came from. If I made a list of 20 famous people I would want to date, she would not make the list. That was very random.

When I woke up, I was so relieved the whole thing was a dream. Both Lindsey and Shay thought it was very funny, but I was still a little worked up over the whole thing. When I got home from work, the whole thing got a bit weirder. I was on the Yahoo homepage and the main headline was this, Jessica Alba gets married in Secret ceremony last night. WEIRD!!!!! I had a dream that I was marrying Jessica Alba the same night she secretly got married. I cant lie, it kinda freaked me out. Maybe it is a sign that I need to be some kind of psychic, I don’t know, but it definitely provided me with a funny story to tell for years to come!

Trying Again...

I have spent the last 45 minutes writing about a recent connection my brain made through pictures. For some reason, I cant seem to transfer my thoughts from brain to words, which has made me very frustrated. Add that to the fact that some kids wont leave my house and I cant decide what to eat, its been a tough night. Then, throw in not seeing my beautiful fiancee all day, my mind has all but shut down.

My natural born laziness has been threatening to overtake me since last week. My brain seems to be working overtime to figure out reasons why I dont have to go to class. For the most part, I have recognized these thoughts and shot them down before having to decide whether or not to act on them. It has been a long time since I have put myself in a position like this. I am doing great in all my classes and there is only 2 weeks left. I should use this as a time to reenergize myself, but it has had an opposite effect. I have never worked harder in school than this last semester, but it hasnt been nearly as gratifying as I expected. Unless i figure out how to reverse all these feelings, I fear that my determination will decrease, through a lack of incentive.

This morning was beautiful. The sun was shining and it was a very comfortable temperature outside. I feel like that explains my life right now. I really have no complaints. But it is what happens when the wind comes up and the clouds come in that I need to be prepared for. Mae very accurately expresses how I feel, "Ready and Waiting to Fall." I am at a peak, and the normal course of life suggests that the fall will come soon. I am lucky enough to recognize this and am going to be prepared. I am pretty sure it will come in the next 3 weeks or so, when I have have to go a few weeks without my rock. The other night I realized, not for the first time and not for the last time I am sure, just how much Shaylee means to me in my life. She left my house after we had watched a movie, and once she left, my whole countenance changed. I had had a tough day, but I got through it then got to spend time with her. After she left, I got so bitter and was in a horrible mood. I could not see the positive in anything around me. I know Satan is working on my very strongly, he sucks. I feel adversity everywhere I go, even more than usual. The wind is pushing me everywhere, but I am doing all I can to not be effected by it. It was a lot like playing basketball today. We played at an elementary school, outside in the wind. Outside shots were impossible, the wind was just too strong. We had to work together and stay close to the basket for anything to work.

I know I have to go out into the wind sometimes to get everything done that I need to. It is these times that I feel so vulnerable, so exposed. The slightest wind seems to test my balance. My usual steady demeanor is bruised and battered, even sleep seems to sap me of energy. The edge seems so close. I know that only I can cause myself to fall off, which I will not allow to happen. The fall is approaching but it will not be over the edge...it will be to the ground and I will be able to pick myself back up. The nice thing about all of this is I have a safety net. My love and rock is more than willing to push me along, even carry me if I need it.

Wow, that was a personal post but it helped me clear my head. Now maybe I can finish the last post I started...

A Full Mind

Just a few things that are on my mind right now.

-Baseball "highlights" are the worst part of Sportscenter.

-I finished season 3 of 24 tonight. Way better than season 2.

-I need to find season 4...

-Can Eric Gagne possibly be any worse? Does anyone doubt that he was on steroids those two seasons when he was unhittable?

-Tiger Woods will win the Masters by 4 strokes. An amateur will finish in the top 15.

-Im excited to watch the Par 3 tournament while I work tomorrow afternoon.

-If I were Bill Self and my alma mater was offering a $6 million signing bonus and $3.5 million per year, I would go.

-If I were Kansas, I would not offer more than $2.5 million per year to keep him.

-Psycho T needs to return to UNC, so does Ty Lawson.

-The UCLA style of play will never win them a national championship.

-I already miss UNLV basketball. Its gonna be a long 7 months...

-My earliest memory is from a packed Thomas and Mack. I remember Tark being introduced and the shark would go around the top of the arena. Visiting teams would leave the floor instead of watch the fireworks and introductions. The only players I remember are Larry Johnson, Stacey Augmon and Greg Anthony.

-Why dont the fireworks intimidate anymore?

-Only 7 weeks until my wedding day.

-My parents are so supportive. I am glad they have let me make decisions and mistakes. It has taught me so much about life.

-There are new episodes of Scrubs, The Office and 30 Rock this week!

-Today is one of the days that I absolutely hate the game of golf. I went to the range and could not hit the dang ball. I have never been so frustrated while practicing, but I stuck around and tried to push through it to no avail...I will be back out there tomorrow.

-Lately I have been in a music funk. Im not really in the mood to listen to anything I have, and nothing new sounds good. This really frustrates me, I never listen just to listen, but that is how I have felt the last few days.

-I like blogging. It allows me to express myself and let others know what is going on in life. I dont care if no one else reads, I will still write. I write for me, not anyone else.

-I saw a flyer for a physics club meeting and thought of Alec.

-Tiffany has helped us so much with our announcements.

-I hope I have more energy tomorrow than today.

I think that is about it. I have more in my head, but nothing is forming into anything complete. Now that college basketball is over, I dont know what I will watch each night, but I am happy I wont have to hear Jay Bilas force his opinions on me.

I made it!

The week is over! Once I get through the first week or so, the hopeless feelings subside. I was actually one of the few that understood our stats homework this week, although Im sure that will not be a normal thing!

A miracle happened last night! Shaylee came over and we watched the Jazz-Suns game. Let me say that again in different terms, a cute girl came over just to cuddle on the couch and watch an NBA game! Not only that, but she knew who each and every one of the players were. One of my dreams has now been fulfilled! At halftime, I told her I was living a dream...I wasnt joking. Dad and Alyssa were sitting front row on the baseline about 3 steps away from the jazz bench and even got some tv time on TNT.

The second biggest thing that happened this week was my huge Madden victory over Justin. We have had some epic battles since coming back up here. The other night I beat him 72-34! Yesterday he beat me to gain back some dignity, but the damage was done.

I would like to give a shout out to Uncle Keith for publicly announcing to the world my disdain for dogs. Now, maybe people will stop being so surprised about that fact when it inevitably reveals itself!

Thats all for now. I got Justin and Shaylee into Friday Night Lights so we will probably spend most of the weekend watching that!

Halfway there

2 Down...2 to go. I finished my first two finals of the semester this morning. Sadly, they were the two I was least worried about so it doesnt take away from much of my stress. Hopefully the next two days will go as smoothly as today...

It is freezing today! I enjoy the snow, but not everything that goes along with it. Shoveling the driveway, scraping ice off my windshield, these are not fun things to do when it is 12 degrees outside. It is amazing how fast you start to lose feeling in your hands! Only a few more days of this until I can enjoy the wonderful Las Vegas winter, which includes none of the above scenarios. I just dont understand how there can be a cloudless sky, yet it is still below freezing.

I got some great pictures of hannah and dad in New York. I am so jealous! I have only spent a day in new york and know there is so much more for me to discover. Not only that, they get to see The Little Mermaid on broadway. It was only a few months ago that Lindsay Egbert and I were scheming on how we could get to see that! I love my dad, he takes such good care of his kids.